It has
been a long time since I have written, too long. So very much has been going on
since my last entry. On Wednesday, May
24th I realized suddenly that something was going on with my body that
it seemed easier to just ignore the inevitable at that moment. Finally, when I
could wait no longer I went and purchased a home pregnancy test. I did not even have to wait the full three
minutes because that “positive” line popped up almost immediately! How could this
be?! Up to that point I had not had even one day of morning sickness which was
very different from my other pregnancies, I had a surgery three years ago that
should ensure a difficult time for a
pregnancy to even begin in my womb, AND I was on birth control ! Confused and
almost disoriented as I was absorbing this new information, I decided I needed
to let it process a little before I shared the news with anyone, even Steven.
He and I were planning a weekend away that coming weekend so I needed to
process the news enough so that I could break it to him gently. Not that he
would be mad or anything but at this time in our life we have six girls already
and I am planning on starting back to school myself in December. The timing was
just a little off and frankly not our plan. I suppose I realized from the
moment I saw the positive results that it had nothing to do with “our plan”
anyway but it is God’s plan.
“For I know the plans I have for you”-This is the Lord’s
declaration-“Plans for our welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and
a hope.” ~Jeremiah 29:11
Nevertheless, I was pretty nervous about having a pregnancy
a little later in life and at that moment our “baby” girl was already five
years old. This was like starting all over again!
“ Sons are indeed a heritage from the Lord, children, a
reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the sons born in one’s youth. Happy is the man who has filled his quiver
with them.” Psalm 127:3-5
We immediately made the decision to not share our news with
anyone until I was safely out of the first trimester. That second trimester
started and we announced the news, first to the girls and we let them decorate
a poster board that said, “We are having a baby” and present it to everyone
that was at bible study that Sunday. Our
parents were as surprised as we were at first I think but seemed very excited. It
seems appropriate that we have his, hers, but no ours so every part of the
pregnancy we decided to share with our family in a fun way. July 4th
we had a family cookout/gender reveal party at our home. I wrapped a boy with
pink and blue paper and the 5 younger girls opened it to reveal the BLUE
balloons. That’s right, blue! We are having a little boy! This is what I wished
for, this is what Steven wished for, and our parents I think. My gut was
telling me that I was growing a son inside of me but I wouldn’t let my myself
get to excited about the possibility until I knew for sure. This has been so
exciting dreaming of blue clothes and footballs! God knew what he was doing! The earlier
mentioned “issues” concerning other family members have not resolved completely
but Steven and I are both in agreement that this boy is going to do great
things! God has plans for him, special plans.
“I chose you before I formed you in the womb; I set you
apart before you were born. I appointed you as a profit to the nations.”
Jeremiah 1:5
After a summer that has gone way to fast I have spent the
last 7 days at the beach with just my three girls. Terri, my sister, came down
for a few days as well. Stevens’s girls are back with their mother after an
eight week stay with us for summer break. It was heart wrenching to say goodbye
to them at summers end. Steven gets to come meet us for the weekend ending our
vacation and I cannot wait to see him! I have been carrying our son for about
23 and a half weeks now and he is growing stronger inside of me every day as I
can feel him shift and move constantly. I am not sure what his purpose is yet
but I feel sure it is something amazing! I will keep you posted on our progress! Please
continue to remember our family in your prayers.